Returning to work tomorrow

Hello everybody. It is about 6pm on Monday evening. Mama brought me home today to pick up my jeep. I am going to attempt to return to work tomorrow morning. A lot of you have questioned whether or not this is a good idea, or if I'm really ready for this. All I can say is I don't know........there's only one way to find out. Of course, the ideal thing would be to not go back until I can at least get through the six chemo treatments, but that is a luxury I simply do not have.

There are days that I feel fine, and then there are days that I'm grateful that I don't have to leave the house. Sunday being one of them. We had a great reunion, and I actually felt better Saturday than I had in quite some time. I was able to eat what I wanted, and, surprisingly, felt no ill effects from it. However, about 11pm that night, the chemo kicked in again, and I was sick until about 3am. This was by far the sickest I have been, and I'm grateful for my two cousins, Betty and Gail, for everything they did to help me. By doing this, my mother did not have to know, and was able to get a good night's rest after a very long and tiring day. I felt fine on Sunday, but was very fatigued and dehydrated. Mama stayed home from church to be with me, and we had a quiet Mother's Day at home this year.

I am scheduled to work 7a to 4p tomorrow with my 3yo patient Aly. She usually wakes up about the time I get there, and we sit in the recliner and watch cartoons until about lunchtime. Hopefully, the hardest part of my day will be getting up at 0530. Her mother has told me to come back whenever I think I'm ready, and what I cannot do, she will do for me. Aly really is easy to work with, and I need to get some sense of normalcy back into my life. However, this IS a trial basis. I'm not going to push myself beyond what I think I'm capable of, or beyond what's in my best interest. It is my goal to work when I feel well enough, and listen to my body and my doctor and stay home when I need to.

Please continue to pray for me this week. I was told to expect to lose my hair between day 10 and day 14. Today is day 10. I have tried to prepare myself for this as much as possible, but how do you do that? All I can do is pray that God will give me the strength to endure it. Sometimes it seems, as soon as I recover from one blow, here comes another. But things could be so much worse. It really is trivial in the whole scheme of things. Other people have problems so much worse than breast cancer or losing their hair. I can handle this. If I couldn't, God would not have allowed it to happen.

Thank you so much for praying for me and my family. It's not just about me..........my whole family is going through this together. I appreciate each and every one of you who take the time to do something nice for us or encourage us. It means so much to me.

I have to wrap this up for now. It's almost 7pm, and I'm still here in Greenville. I have to get home, iron a uniform, pack a lunch, etc. I'm getting ready to get in my jeep and drive for the first time since April 6th! I'm gonna roll the windows down, crank up the radio, and let the wind blow through my hair while I still have some!! : )

I'll post again after my labwork on Wednesday,
Cindy